My Dad Bob—Died 6 Years ago Valentines Day

I am realizing that the pain of missing a loved one transforms with time. I actually relish remembering my father Bob–one of the Greatest Generation who impacted my life with his love for God, people, and nature.

Valentines Day is becoming a joy in rememberance of the love, fellowship, and good times we enjoyed with my earthly father, Bob Hammond. He was the sweetest guy who really “Got it” when it came to thankfulness and gratitude. He was always and eternally grateful for all the “nice occasions” he was experiencing by the grace of God. He always gave God all the credit….faithful, thankful, joyful, and prayerful…in all things.
I still find myself wondering why i am reacting or acting as he would have in given circumstances. Help!—I am becoming my dad!….both good, bad, and the ugly. At the end of the day my hope is in the resurrection at the end of days when Jesus calls us home and we have eternity to get caught up. this hope is a driving force to live and love and to go forward—even in grief. This Great Gathering is more than beyond what I can conceive in my puny brain–so I am forced to trust, believe and have faith in the word and the Author, Perfecter, and Finisher of my faith.
See you soon dad and Abba Father God.
Scott

The $1.50 Hot Date at Cost Co

What kind of life do I have when the highlight of my week is a date with my wife at Costco?

With 9 kids, you can imagine it’s difficult to have any quality time to talk, reflect, communicate, or simply get on the same page with your spouse. My premise here is to show just how spending time together, no matter where it is, is the key to a great marriage.
I’ll tell you about the story of our Costco date, the benefits of our time away, and the satisfaction it brings me to be with my wife.

We start with a list. We must do an inventory of what we need to buy at Costco—paper products, cereal, refried beans, milk, eggs, frozen items, etc. etc..

Then comes the drive, where we catch up with on the week’s activities and just generally talk about life.
Here is where we set the stage for some time of good communication and quality time together.

Going into Costco is always fun, as there are several regulars who are colorful, wonderful, and friendly.
I do have to pull myself away from the high-definition televisions that my wife will not let me own.
We inevitably see other couples on their Costco date as well.

One of the highlights is the tasty samples, and of course looking for the great deal.
I just found some really cool Docker sweats for only nine dollars!

We grab our food at the food court, where Judy always asks about our kids and if indeed we’re on another date. We say yes, of course, and exchange pleasantries.

Now comes the time to carefully load up our catch and drive to the selected spot of the day to enjoy our quiet dinner-a sumptuous repast par excellent!
Here’s where we talk about the deeper things; kids, goals, schedules, God, the upcoming week, and life in general.

Time for the drive home. Sometimes we stop at Starbucks, which always is a great way to end a Costco run. We get home now, and the kids unload the Costco booty and are delighted to see stuff that they wanted. And we needed.

I discover that I do have a life when the highlight of my week is a Costco run/date with my wife.
Life is good. When I have time away with my best friend to shop, have dinner, go to Starbucks, and just have fun.

What am I lacking at this time?
Nothing.

THE THANKSGIVING TOP 10

Top 1o Reasons for me to give thanks on Thanksgiving:

1. God-The Relationship vs. the Religion
2. My wife Joni–Best Friend and lover
3. My 9 kids and their significant others
4. Our extended Family-Yes, even the In-Laws!
5. Church Family-Locally and all over the Earth
6. Our Humboldt Community-Business and Networks
7. My Job–Nice to have these days…
8. Having Vision/Mission/Passion-Desire and Focus and positive ambitions.
9. Health, Well-being, Joyfulness–The usual
10. You–Known or never met-You are loved…

Happy Thanksgiving!

Best,

Scott hammond

Leadership and 5 Secrets of Legacy

Leadership means many things to many people…I think it means being proactive… being the first:

• Taking the initiative
• Setting the standard
• Managing
• Planning
• Resourcing
• Identifying vision, goals and priorities
• A good leader takes responsibility and says” the buck stops here”.
• Leaders show the way and model by example what they’re trying to accomplish.
• Leaders press on and press in, and they run counter to the culture of convenience… they refuse to get stuck in the “bright and shiny objects”, diversions, and side eddies of our culture.
• Leaders strain and strive with intentionality and energy to build relationships and create a legacy and heritage and their families…. I do much of this is simply by taking the initiative, being intentional and planning by writing and accomplishing compelling goals that are relationship based…

Leaving a Legacy of Leadership

Who does not want to leave a positive legacy!
We want to leave a heritage to my family, friends, church and community at large.

Think about your personal leadership, through which you leave us a legacy to those behind you. See life as a chance to identify your purpose, position, passion, and posture.

What shapes you?  Intentions?  Motives?  Opinions?  Thoughts?  Responses?  What shapes your words, attitudes, deeds, reactions, and more?

So what is leadership, do you have it?
How do you get it?
What are you leaving behind now?
What do you want to leave behind?
What will change in order for you to do the above?
How do you get there from here?

To impress or to influence…
would you rather impress someone or truly have an influence in their life?  Impressions are on the surface, therefore, are often superficial.
Influence on the other hand, is often real, honest, and requires far more ability.
Influence necessitates communication with people and the cessation of self absorption.

Your life’s lessons…
Many of our life’s lessons are made up from our experiences, relationships, and mistakes. Have you been honest with your fears, failures, frustrations, and feelings?

The above serve to shape your life’s message. That life’s message consists of a spiritual component, your life’s lessons, your life’s passions, and indeed, your life’s mission. Most of what we call failure can be transformed to tangible lessons we can share with those we have relationships with; pain transformed to purpose and passion.

Every leader has 5 components that define him or her.

1. Let’s talk about your POSITION…
Are you in a position to be credible, vulnerable, real, and genuine?
Are you believable, touchable, straight up, humane, and do you have integrity?

2.  Every leader must have his PURPOSE.
People are the priority.
Are you able to connect with people are you a relationship builder?
Do you serve and meet needs?
Do you truly love other people?
Can you allow love to define your purpose and thereby your leadership legacy?

3. The third element of leadership is your POSTURE.
Do you live in a posture of being open, teachable, and always learning?  Are you able to lose preconceived notions ideas and attitudes?  You walk in the Spirit and live in the art of possibility in your day-to-day living?

4. One last element is your PASSION.
Passions define leadership.
What are you passionate about?  Are you a spokesperson for your passions?  What causes, groups of people, or issues do you champion?

5. Your Mission in life.
Do you want to leave a legacy of love for those around you?
Then have quality relationships with people.  Be an example to follow.  Serve others.

Leaving a legacy of leadership also means the facing and overcoming of adversity.  How you deal with adversity defines you. Are you bitter, or better?
You will need faith to face your challenges. Then you can come through, as someone who can truly serve others and help them in their time of need.

A  LEADER–

• A leader knows where she is going, why she is going, and how to get there
• A leader knows no discouragement, presents no alibi
• A leader knows how to lead without being dictatorial; true leaders are humble
• A leader leads for the good of the most concerned, and not for personal gratification of his or her own ideas
• A leader looks for the best in those he or she serves
• A leader marches with a group, and interprets correctly the signs of the pathway that leads to success
• A leader has his or her head in the clouds, but his or her feet on the ground
• A true leader considers leadership as an opportunity for service
• A leader is one who has not sought the high places, but who’s been drafted into service because of his or her ability and willingness to serve
• A leader listens, communicates, and cares
• A leader has courageous conversations
• A leader manages time, money, resources and is a good steward
• A leader washes dishes, cleans the bathrooms, and does what’s needed
• A leader does not look for, nor require, kudos

In conclusion, we all need to–
Find our voice and use it toward our life’s passions, purpose, posture, and position to leave a legacy of leadership. Find your voice and your gifts, and use your voice and your gifts. Lastly, help others find their voice and their gifts, so they too may leave a lasting legacy of leadership and a heritage of love.

20 Steps to Compelling Goals

20 Steps to Compelling Goals

1. Have SMART goals
2. Have strategies that work– Make sure your goals are workable, realistic, and actionable.
3. Have good implementation—follow through and be methodical, sequential and incremental.  Start small and do not despise the day of small beginnings.
4. Accountability—be accountable to trusted advisors and mentors and those more experienced.  Coach and mentor others as well.  Hold yourself and others accountable to your goals.
5. Minimize distraction—focus on what’s important—keep the main thing the main thing
6. Commit to your goals and plans—daily review your goals and adjust as needed
7. Communicate your goals, with all stakeholders and family members—don’t do this in a corner.
8. Post written goals publicly—be very public and very accountable and very up front with  goals
9. Get family buy in and immediately—kid buying in and commitment to everyone involved.  Share what you have in mind with others who play a role in the plans success and achievement.
10. 10. Have daily, weekly, monthly meetings to review goals and progress
11. Develop reasonable implementation schedule and stick to it—calendarize!
12. Do your plans, see what happens, adjust as needed, and keep in touch with those who can help you stay on track.  Accountability works great!
13. Evaluate—revisit current goals and paradigms and find what works and what doesn’t.  Implement change immediately.  If it works.  Do not fix it.
14. Think out of the box—creatively brainstorm. Be fearless and try new things.  Get feedback from trusted advisors and mentors.
15. Go away—go somewhere way from all distraction and develop a compelling parenting plan.
16. Create a culture of accountability, celebration and clarity—celebrate achievement by awarding team and individual accomplishment.  Give public and private encouragement and praise. reward achievement
17. Communicate expectations—have courageous conversations and be clear on expectations. Communicate, communicate, and communicate.
18. Leverage your time and manager prime times of the day—the times where energy is the highest and most focused.
19. Just do it—plan the work and work the plan. Commit to high performance.  Kill procrastination and perfectionism.  Keep a sense of humor.  Learn to grow and change.  It back in action and get involved.
20. Dream it, write it down, and just do it— rediscover your passion, mission and purpose today.  You have a choice, time, resources, and ability.  Now it’s up to you.

Life on Purpose/10 Goal Setting Tips

If you want something, you have to do something. The key is to get going.

1. Set a goal. This is harder that it seems. Generally, we have an idea of what we’d like—to be more successful, healthier, and happier—but we stop there. Vague desires aren’t goals, they’re dreams. Remember you can’t reach a goal you have not set yet.
2. Understand and accept the tradeoffs. Every goal has unpleasant aspects. Identify the good things—“I want to make more money,” and the less good—“I have to work harder or smarter.” Understand the downsides, and accept them as necessary to the process.
3. Commit to your goal. Being ambivalent is disastrous. Success does not come from—or to—which-washy people.
4. Set a deadline. Deadlines give goals a framework for action. You can’t reach a goal without a meaningful deadline.
5. Commit to the deadline. Commitment is critical for making improvement. Make your deadline mean something.
6. Tell people. Make your goal tangible by sharing it with others. Say it out loud and put it on paper.
7. Outline intermediate steps. Things don’t go from here to there without passing through some middle territory. It’s easier to take many small steps than one big leap.
8. Get help. Partner up. Since we have to do things that are new to us, we’re inexperienced. Often, it’s best to get professional help, but even friends or colleagues can assist. On your journey to your new goal, you don’t have to make the trip alone.
9. Take action. Soon! Your resolve can slip—and then time goes by. Take the first step now. The sooner you do, the more likely you are to achieve your ultimate goal.
10. Commit again. And again. For improvements to occur, you have to embrace them over and over. Take it step by step—but keep moving forward—and I year from now, you’ll find you’ve moved from here to ther.

Thanks to Dr. Richard Borough

The 3 Compelling “C’s” of Awesome Parenting

1. Compelling Communication–Speak and communicate, talk and listen, and keep open lines of communication with your family– make time to have focused attention, eye contact,  and appropriate physical touch as you connect with your kids.
2. Compelling Family Culture--Develop a culture of “togetherness” as you accept, honor, and respect each family member for their unique contributions.  Practice unconditional love as you learn to accept one another and take appropriate pride in your own family identity.
3. Compelling Relationships–Make quality of relationships the most important priority in your family life.  Make sure you manage, nurture, and cherish your family relationships as they really are the most important part of life.  Give them the time, resources, and effort they deserve.

Expert Parenting– 40 ways to really love your kids

The National Down Syndrome Congress Conference was an awesome experience and  I was honored to meet such great parents. Parents are the experts and  really know what works in the raising of  great kids. Here are 40 ways to enhance your parenting skills from some of the best parents on Earth…

We surveyed all the parents in attendance of my conference session entitled 5 Secrets of Effective Parents and found the following 40 parental best practices:

1. patience– this was #1. by 10 to one.
2. flexibility
3. sense of humor
4. having ans using good listening skills
5. being principled
6. being a creative
7. love and acceptance
8. creating less stress
9. prioritizing time
10. having a plan B.
11. having seeking mentors
12. understanding
13. encouragement
14. empathy
15. discipline
16. personal responsibility
17. personal self-care
18. being consistent
19. having a good support structure
20. being in the moment
21. acceptance
22. family activities
23. teaching
24. having boundaries
25. encouraging individuality
26. laugh or being silly
27. much prayer
28. being  understanding
29. being supportive
30. having a good attitude
31. having good communication
32. loving God
33. staying  calm
34. being aware
35. having adaptable planning
36. avoiding conflict
37. unconditional love
38. quality time
39. studying your children
40. having a strong marriage

We have much to learn…pick 3 and get started today.

What are your strengths/weaknesses above?

How will you leverage each today?

If not you, who?

If not now, when?

Scott Hammond Introduction

Gabriel Speech–Leave a Legacy

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