KNOW, LIKE, TRUST AND BUY YOU…………..?
May 22, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
Know you, Like you, Trust you, Buy you?
KNOW, LIKE, TRUST ,AND BUY YOU?
PARENTING TIP #5.–Create Some “Special Time”
May 13, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
Create some special time with just you and your child.
Just that intentional 1 to 1 time can yield big relationship dividends.
Name 1 thing you can commit to and JUST DO IT!
Burn that bridge and get that date with your kid into your mental or actual day-timer today!
Set up a standing date AND also be spontaneous.
Both in concert will benefit your relationship for years to come.
Remember this: Quality Time comes from Quantity Time—-You must invest your precious time.
Name the activity then—movies, outings, sports, trips, food, chores, projects and so much more…….
You don’t HAVE to do this—You GET to…
It is not because she has earned this time, but because she needs this time with dad.
What do you say dad?
Parenting Tip #4.–Give Them Some Responsibility
May 5, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
Give your kid some custom fitted work.
What I mean is this: find some small responsibility that is perfect for your child.
Convey to him that he has been carefully selected for this special job.
Pick something that is age and ability appropriate and assign it—do it in writing or a chart if necessary.
There are 100′s of small responsibilities to choose from—pick a few.
Here are a few categories—Home, car, pets, yard, kitchen, food, garage, trash, dishes, laundry, and the list goes on….
This assignment will do 3 key things for the family.
- Create a sense of value and worth in Junior–She will feel awesome as she is successful and told so.
- You as a parent will have a lighter load–Now you can spend that quality time with her or some YOU Time.
- There will develop a family culture of teamwork–You will all begin to understand and experience family team contribution paradigm.
Start today and be smart–”Let” them pick out some pre-arranged chores and take ownership.
Chart it and hold accountable. Keep it fun and encourage and reward with frequency.
You and they will be glad you did–You are the parent and the leader: make this happen today!
Parenting Tip #3.—Demonstrate your Love and Show Affection
April 28, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
As parents, be demonstrative of your love for each other.
Show appropriate physical affection. Do this parent to parent and parent to child as well.
I am reminded if I refuse to hug my teen girls, there are PLENTY of young men ready to fulfill my duty…
Our kids need regular, appropriate physical touch—so does our spouse. So do I!
The kids need to see in each parent nurturing, gentle love and , when needed, the firm-yet-respectful love.
This “tough love” can manifest in a “courageous conversation” (not lecture dad!) or in simply doing and saying the right thing–always in a spirit of love.
Show your love today—Be a “hugger”—Surprise them by being that person who is warm, loving, and not afraid to show it.
BTW: say “I love you”—regularly, and mean it.
PARENTING TIP #2.–STICK TOGETHER!!
April 21, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
As parents, we need to support each other’s decisions as we train our kids and raise them into adulthood.
If you are not willing to support each other’s parenting decisions morally or philosophically, do not implement the parent action until you can.
This is the essence of Parental Unity. think, act, and be as one as you parent!
This will likely require meetings between mom and dad to make proposals, listen, adjust, refine, compromise, and convince.
Change will be the outcome—change in approach, attitude, and perhaps outcome in the way you parent.
The key here is this: Are you willing to lay aside SOME of your past parenting paradigms–you know the stuff your parents did.
be committed to arriving at a place you both can accept and support as a team. otherwise , you’ll be divide and such division will be sensed by the kids.
It is in their and your interest to reach agreement and become unified as you parent together for a lifetime those you love and are in a parenting role with.
Hot Tip: Hold hands next time you have a “courageous conversation” with your child. First off–it will blow their mind.
Then, they will see you are in unity and may even listen attentively as you both speak from the strength of your new found unity.
Go Team!
LEAVING YOUR BUSINESS LEGACY IN 5 EASY STEPS—PART #3.
March 19, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
BUSINESS LEGACYScott Hammond (the every day dad) Live from Humboldt What will be your legacy?
There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened.
What will they say at your memorial? What would you want them to say?
THAT will be your legacy and it will be too late to start working on your life of significance at your memorial. You can begin TODAY to work toward a “Business and life legacy” and really make a positive difference!
How do you leave a legacy of positive business leadership? Who doesn’t want to leave a positive legacy? Leadership and legacy means being PROACTIVE…Take the lead and be the instigator!
Think about your personal leadership… See life as a chance to identify your purpose, position, passion, and posture and then
TRUE STORY
I worked for Ron Pileggi for 20 years at the local Tri City Weekly and he exemplified a business leader who left an awesome business and life legacy. Ron always made life about RELATIONSHIPS. He modeled how to really care about and serve others with his staff, customers, community and in his industry.
Staff- Ron modeled “servant-leadership” in that he really helped his staff wherever possible. He showed a boss who was involved on a personal level and really loved his staff by showing it in his actions.
Customers—Ron went the extra mile to really serve and meet needs of his customers. He even would give it away if it meant helping a fellow businessperson get back on their marketing feet.
Community-Ron was an example of a guy trying to make a positive difference in our community. Whether it was serving in Rotary, helping various non-profits, or just showing up at events, Ron was present and a servant of all.
Industry—As an industry pioneer and leader, Ron shared expertise in the Free Paper Industry of America freely. Not only was his publication multiple award winning over years, he gladly shared his trade success secrets with fellow entrepreneurs.
Ron left an amazing legacy across the board—Staff, Customers, Community and Industry. He intentionally modeled ‘servant-leadership” in the roles he served.
Here are 5 Easy “Knows” to a Great Life and Business Legacy:
1. Know Legacy–Understand and Know what a Legacy is–Begin to study what a legacy is and how we are all leaving behind something” in our lives we will be remembered for. Study the lives of those who you know have made a positive difference in their world.
2. Know Thyself–Begin to look at your life and what you are leaving behind and what you are now known for. What is it that people remember about you and your life? Be honest! Ask safe people who will give it to you straight and without apology. It is about what others know about you vs. how you perceive yourself. You may be really surprised …
3. Know Thy Legacy–Pick and focus on one aspect of your life that yields positive results and influences others in a significant way–Find your message, media, and platform and go to work leaving behind something meaningful to others. Live your life of significance with intention.
4. Know Thy Audience–Who listens when you talk? Who picks up when you “throw down”? Who are your peeps and those who love you? These are the ones ripe for receiving your legacy message.
5. Know Thy Media–Begin to find and understand your most comfortable platform and medium for delivering your legacy message. This can be written, spoken, crafted, or lived out loud in some way. Most folks begin with some writing or speaking—the written and spoken word has tons of possibility when leaving your life of significance. Blogging, public speaking, or writing your book all have potential for great legacy tools. All legacy begins with being a good communicator—be one!
It is time for us to get busy and become more intentional about leaving behind a life of business legacy and living with and on purpose. Each of us has a limited number of days on Earth (Grandpa Tom says, “No one gets out of here alive!”) and we need to be purposeful in how we live. Know legacy, yourself, your own legacy, your platform and your audience and you will begin to make a positive difference and leave an awesome legacy!
Life and business will have more meaning and so will you! Start living your legacy today—we’ll be glad you did.
“You Just Broke Your Child. Congratulations.” by Dan Pearce
March 19, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
This is the all-time best article I have ever shared on this site.
I stumbled upon this beautifully written article by accident and was so moved from the opening that I
could not tear myself away.This is the all-time most hit blog on this site.
There are many very powerful and true statements.
As the Dad of nine awesome children, I think the words shared here are very important, for both dads and moms!
Sometimes we all have not so great days and life gets in the way of us doing the things we should.
Dad and Gabe
I’m at a loss for words, but (in the best way I know how) I just wanted to let you know how much it has
blessed and challenged me. Children are a gift, children are ALL beautiful, and all children deserve to be children and
feel loved, and wanted and respected at all times. Read and enjoy and change for the best! Feel free to re-post, comment and share at will.
——————————————————————————————————————————————————————–
“Dads. Stop breaking your children. Please.
I feel a need to write this post after what I witnessed at Costco yesterday. Forgive me for another post written in desperation and anger. Please read all the way to the end. I know it’s long, but this is something that needs to be said. It’s something that needs to be heard. It’s something that needs to be shared.
As Noah and I stood in line to make a return, I watched as a little boy (he couldn’t have been older than six) looked up at his dad and asked very timidly if they could buy some ice cream when they were done. The father glared him down, and through clenched teeth, growled at the boy to “leave him alone and be quiet”. The boy quickly cowered to the wall where he stood motionless and hurt for some time.A
The line slowly progressed and the child eventually shuffled back to his father as he quietly hummed a childish tune, seemingly having forgotten the anger his father had just shown. The father again turned and scolded the boy for making too much noise. The boy again shrunk back and cowered against the wall, wilted….”
Read the complete article by Dan Pearce here.
I also recommend you check out his new book, Real Dad Rules.
Feel free to add to the hundreds of comments below or shoot me an email today: sjhammond@suddenlink.net.
“
Legacy, Dying, and Regrets
February 9, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
REGRETS OF THE DYING
People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.
In Remember-ence of Robert Lewis Hammond 1921-2004—Birthday 1/29/21—Would’ve been 91 Years young today.
February 5, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
My father, Bob Hammond, grew up in Iowa during the Depression.
He was poor but got to do two years of college before being enlisted in the Army Air Corps during World War II.
Consequently, our family grew up within the confines of alcoholism and dysfunction.
As I got older, and my father got sober, we forged a relationship for a lifetime.
His
support for me, going to Humboldt State, coupled with a mutual
spiritual revival, made for a lifelong friendship until his death in
2004.
My father always supported my educational goals and expressed
confidence in me; he always believed in my choices and was available
24/7.
The lessons my father taught me had to do with relationships.
My dad was a people guy, a hugger who loved crossword puzzles, plants, music, people, and God most of all.
His legacy of kindness, acceptance, thankfulness, gratitude, and forgiveness will always be with me.
As an alcoholic, he always had a special place in his heart for those who struggled with alcoholism.
He was careful to always forgive, and never had an evil word, even when one might be earned.
My father left an inherent sense of godliness, spiritual value, and
a kindness that transcends most people you’ll ever meet. Although he
was a warrior in World War II and killed many while flying a P51
Mustang,the rest of his life was spent building, not destroying. He’ll
always be remembered in our family as the ice cream grandpa, who always
insisted on multiple gallons of ice cream with each and every visit.
Here’s to the legacy of a great guy, one of the greatest generation.
Bob Hammond---Good Guy 1921--2004
MONEY AND LEGACY
January 4, 2012 by Scott Hammond
Filed under Scott Hammond
Is Your Legacy Defined by Dollar Signs?
“Man’s highest happiness is found in the bestowal of benefits on those he loves; love finds it’s most natural and spontaneous expression in giving. The man who has nothing to give cannot fill his place as a husband or father, as a citizen, or a man. It is in the use of material things that a man finds full life for his body, develops his mind, and unfolds his soul. It is therefore of supreme importance to him that he should be rich.”
- Wallace Wattles
People are often under the misconception that money brings happiness and if they had more money, they would be that much happier. But does money really define who you are? Is your legacy made or broken because of the amount of money you have?
How does one achieve more money?
Money comes from your growth and your success. Money will not give you higher self-esteem, but higher self-esteem can lead to more money. Once you are successful, the money will then follow. Think of a high school diploma. You don’t get the diploma first do you? You have to go through the work first and the diploma is recognition for what you have accomplished.
How can money ruin a person?
We have all heard of those people who win the lottery and end up with nothing. Why does this happen? They were given the high school diploma first. They did not have to fail and succeed over and over again to achieve their diploma. There was no work involved. They were given something they didn’t know how to handle properly. You must work for your success and for your money. There is nothing given for free in this life.
You have the choice
In the end, happiness is a decision. You decide if you are happy and what makes you happy. Money will, at times, make you feel great. You can buy whatever you want whenever you want. If you think piles and piles of money is your happiness, then so be it. But money will not make you who you are and it does not decide who is happy and who isn’t.
What will your legacy if you were to stop living today? What would people say about you? Would they say, “Hey, David passed away today. You know, the guy with x amount of dollars in his pocket?” or will they say, “Hey, David passed away today. You know the guy who worked hard and gave so much to people. He cared a lot about everyone. I bet his family is devastated.” You make the choice and hold your fate in your hands.
Daniel is the leader and dad behind the dad-parenting blog www.daddydirection.com. Check out his blog for more parenting and dad specific techniques.