In Remember-ence of Robert Lewis Hammond 1921-2004—Birthday 1/29/21—Would’ve been 91 Years young today.

My father, Bob Hammond, grew up in Iowa during the Depression.
He was poor but got to do two years of college before being enlisted in the Army Air Corps during World War II.
Consequently, our family grew up within the confines of alcoholism and dysfunction.
As I got older, and my father got sober, we forged a relationship for a lifetime.
His
support for me, going to Humboldt State, coupled with a mutual
spiritual revival, made for a lifelong friendship until his death in
2004.
My father always supported my educational goals and expressed
confidence in me; he always believed in my choices and was available
24/7.
The lessons my father taught me had to do with relationships.
My dad was a people guy, a hugger who loved crossword puzzles, plants, music, people, and God most of all.
His legacy of kindness, acceptance, thankfulness, gratitude, and forgiveness will always be with me.
As an alcoholic, he always had a special place in his heart for those who struggled with alcoholism.
He was careful to always forgive, and never had an evil word, even when one might be earned.
My father left an inherent sense of godliness, spiritual value, and
a kindness that transcends most people you’ll ever meet. Although he
was a warrior in World War II and killed many while flying a P51
Mustang,the rest of his life was spent building, not destroying. He’ll
always be remembered in our family as the ice cream grandpa, who always
insisted on multiple gallons of ice cream with each and every visit.
Here’s to the legacy of a great guy, one of the greatest generation.

MONEY AND LEGACY

Is Your Legacy Defined by Dollar Signs?

 

“Man’s highest happiness is found in the bestowal of benefits on those he loves; love finds it’s most natural and spontaneous expression in giving. The man who has nothing to give cannot fill his place as a husband or father, as a citizen, or a man. It is in the use of material things that a man finds full life for his body, develops his mind, and unfolds his soul. It is therefore of supreme importance to him that he should be rich.”

-          Wallace Wattles

 

People are often under the misconception that money brings happiness and if they had more money, they would be that much happier. But does money really define who you are? Is your legacy made or broken because of the amount of money you have?

 

How does one achieve more money?

Money comes from your growth and your success. Money will not give you higher self-esteem, but higher self-esteem can lead to more money. Once you are successful, the money will then follow. Think of a high school diploma. You don’t get the diploma first do you? You have to go through the work first and the diploma is recognition for what you have accomplished.

 

How can money ruin a person?

We have all heard of those people who win the lottery and end up with nothing. Why does this happen? They were given the high school diploma first. They did not have to fail and succeed over and over again to achieve their diploma. There was no work involved. They were given something they didn’t know how to handle properly. You must work for your success and for your money. There is nothing given for free in this life.

 

You have the choice

In the end, happiness is a decision. You decide if you are happy and what makes you happy. Money will, at times, make you feel great. You can buy whatever you want whenever you want. If you think piles and piles of money is your happiness, then so be it. But money will not make you who you are and it does not decide who is happy and who isn’t.

 

What will your legacy if you were to stop living today? What would people say about you? Would they say, “Hey, David passed away today. You know, the guy with x amount of dollars in his pocket?” or will they say, “Hey, David passed away today. You know the guy who worked hard and gave so much to people. He cared a lot about everyone. I bet his family is devastated.” You make the choice and hold your fate in your hands.

 

 

Daniel is the leader and dad behind the dad-parenting blog www.daddydirection.com. Check out his blog for more parenting and dad specific techniques.

 

9 Guidelines for dealing with change—

1. All change involves loss, feelings of sadness and frustration. You can’t control everything that happens to you, but you can control how you respond to the situation.  You should face the change and deal with it directly, and not ignore the situation.

2. Change can give you a feeling of self-doubt. You can talk yourself into a sense of failure or being afraid.  Counteract this feeling with positive self-talk.  Take stock of your strengths and what you have going for you.  Think of people you can talk to who can give you suggestions for the situation you’re dealing with now.

3. Change creates stress. Find positive ways of dealing with the stress.  It may be helpful to talk to someone about your anger and frustrations.  Give yourself some time and space to relax, away from your stress, which may help you see things differently or even positively.

4. Review the last few changes in which you have have dealt with.  Identify what has helped you deal with them, as well as what didn’t work for you.  This can give you an idea of which coping methods help you, and which don’t.

5. Keep your sense of humor, which is one of the best stress fighters there is.  Laughter is good therapy and actually makes people healthier.  You can’t laugh and worry at the same time, so choose laughter.  Accept your feelings and focus on moving forward.

6. Fill the time left by the change with new and interesting pursuits. Take a class you always wanted to, write those letters you been putting off, start a new project, or join a new group.

7. Communicate with family and friends. Changes are usually accompanied by conflicting emotions.  Talking to others about your situation may relieve the tension and make you feel better.  It also allows you to get another person’s perspective and help others to understand what they’re going through.

8. Focus on the rewards the change may bring, such as more personal time or new friendships. Anticipate setbacks and view them as a normal part of the change process, rather than as a failure.

9. Depression may be a response to change but is rarely permanent. You may not even feel you have the energy to deal and cope with the change.  Don’t be afraid to get professional help by calling on friends or professionals who can help you face your change with less anxiety and more confidence and peace of mind.

SUCCESSFUL PARENTING

Successful Parenting—

Successful parents are clear and spot on with what they’re trying to accomplish in training their children. Discipline and focus must balance grace and mercy. There must be a balance between grace and discipline in managing a family in raising great kids.

Great parents are intentional parents. They know what they’re doing and why they’re doing it. Parenting also comes with the mandate to be flexible. Flexibility coupled with humor, grace, mercy, forgiveness, and the ability to keep it light will help parents get through many a dark time.

Training our kids through leading them by example and serving them is also a key component in that our values are usually caught not taught. This modeling of our values and walking our talk is key in setting an example for our kids to follow.

As we live our values as parents, our kids are taught and catch what we are instructing by the message of our lives and example. The key is for parents to be totally focused on this key role, whilst understanding none of us are perfect— thus we need grace both on others and for ourselves as parents.

BIG DEEP BREATHS

Learning To Be In The Moment
Learning to be present or mindful is a lifelong pursuit.  Intentionality and focus are all important and can lead to the skill of being present.  There are things that you can do today to help.  Many of the techniques involve breathing – focus on it;  it’s almost guaranteed to bring you back to the moment requires no special tools or training, so it’s a perfect way to begin. Breathe deep and focus.
Try to adopt one of these ideas, even once a day – whichever one seems easiest.  Once you experience being in the present, you can find you want to try other techniques to extend the feeling.  Here are a few examples –
• When the phone rings, don’t jump up to answer it. Take a good, deep breath before you say hello.
• Program your computer or watch to beep once an hour. When you hear the beep, stop and take five deep breaths. You may want to stand and stretch too.
• Before getting out of bed, take five minutes to do a mental scan of your body. How does everything feel?
• Before rising in the morning, utilize your “Tabernacle Choir”.  Remember all the positives of your life.  Remember, rehearse, and review all the good things and grace that has been given you.
• Practice doing just one thing at a time. Stop multitasking; it will poison your soul and mind. If you’re eating, don’t watch TV or read. You will gain up to 5 extra weeks a year in lost time and productivity. If you’re walking, don’t talk; focus on a single activity.
• As you eat, take small bites and chew each one 30 times. You will discover you enjoy your food more, and it’s healthier to.
• Stop, look , and listen. Really smell the flowers, listen to people, focus your attention, and be in the process of the moment. You will be more peaceful, focused, loving, present, and engaged as well as engaging!
1. Slowing down-2. Taking deep breaths-3. Intentionally noticing your surroundings-4. Stopping, looking, and listening-5. Connecting to and communicating with those around you-6. Being present, focused, and in the moment-
Once you start developing the ability to be present at certain times of the day, you have developed a valuable skill to call on to defuse stress at any time.  As with learning a sport or musical instrument, the more you practice, the more adept and you’ll become.  Before you know it, you’ll be nowhere else but here. Are you here and in the moment right now?

Over Achiever??

Solutions for the Over-achieving Parent• Enjoy the moment. Stop and really concentrate on the small joys of life.• Be here now. Really focus on others and what they are communicating• Practice thankfulness for what it is now. Mentally and verbally give thanks for all you enjoy• Buy a Koi pond and go “watch the fish”. At least go outside and breathe, stretch and notice nature in its various forms.• Take breaks, stop and smell the flowers, intentionally enjoy life. Take a walk daily at work or home to break up the routine• Accept that less is more. What are we REALLY lacking in any moment?• Learn to push, then stop and wait for the results and be patient. Really know when you have done enough, then stop and give thanks.  It will be there tomorrow.• Bring your best contribution to all relationships. Really make relationships your #1 priority in life.  • Surrender to the moment, circumstance, or situation. Practice really letting go of any situation you have no control over. Rest. Pray. Release.• Take quiet breaks and rest. Walk. Go outside. Go Inside. Close the door. Time out.• Forgive with intentionality. Really release it and forget it. Move on…• Let it go. Stop your mind from negatively replaying what you cannot control.• Move along. Look to the next thing. Get over yourself.• Operate from the concept of a universe of abundance. There is more than enough for everyone.• Relax at work. Take a daily walk.• Breathe deep. Fill your lungs with air so that your stomach expands.  Do this each hour.• Totally trust God and pray. Learn to reach out to God in personal prayer and really speak with Him. Tell Him how you feel. He can take it. • Take vacations. Schedule in advance, save the resources, plan with gusto, and just do it.• Stop the “self-beatings”. As you have the inevitable setbacks of life, simply resolve in advance to not add to the disappointment by adding self- deprecation of any type. Make it a point to stop negative self- talk. • Monitor and question moods and attitudes. Practice self-control and be aware of your personal emotional cycles and weaknesses and adjust your perspective from there. Know yourself and adjust accordingly.• Surrender and accept what is. It is what it is…and it can be better if you are willing.

10 Tips for Family Life

10 Tips For Quality Family Life

Parents and their children are spending less time interacting with each other. As a result, many children are getting less personal love and attention than their parents did. American Demographics reported that parents today spend roughly 40 percent less time with their children than did parents a generation ago. To help families stay connected, below is a list of helpful family time tips. Keep in mind, quantity and quality time is important when choosing activities. So build memories around exciting events by keeping your family time creative and enjoyable. Print out the following tips as daily reminders.
1. Eat together & listen to each other. Most children today don’t know the meaning of a family dinnertime. Yet the communication and unity built during this setting is integral to a healthy family life. Sharing a meal together allows the opportunity to talk about each other’s lives. This is a time for parents to listen, as well as to give advice and encouragement. Attentive listening conveys a message that a person is really interested in another. It also imparts a sense of worth and helps develop trust. Therefore, listening is a critical link in successful parenting.
2. Read often. It’s important for parents to read to their children. The latest research indicates that reading to your children cultivates an interest for knowledge and stimulates language development. It also increases their attention spans and helps them become more curious. Look for books that your child would enjoy reading. After reading, ask questions about the content.
3. Do chores together. Part of what goes on in the home is the development of teamwork. Functional family life depends on the contribution of everyone. Assigning chores is the most productive way of teaching responsibility and accountability to your children. Doing chores with your child will help foster good communication skills.
4. Help with schoolwork. A great way to spend quality time with children and light a fire of learning is to help children with their schoolwork. A parent’s eagerness to help will cause a child to become more interested in school thus improving his or her grades. Regular trips to the library for school projects are an inexpensive and enjoyable way to spend time with children. Helping should begin with an understanding that children are responsible for homework. Parents are there to help their child get organized and to encourage them when they get stuck.
5. Start a hobby or project. Choose a fun activity that your child is interested in. Activities like cooking, crafts, fishing, or biking will make great hobbies that can open the door to exciting family time. Once a child learns a new recipe or is able to cast a lure accurately, let him or her take the lead with your supervision.
6. Play games. New technology has made video games more prevalent. As a result, many children are spending long hours in front of the TV playing computer programs. Parents should find creative ways to spark an interest in family-oriented contests such as board games or card games. This will give parents additional time to talk and nurture their relationship.
7. Plan a family outing. Sometimes getting out of the house is important. Hop in the family car and go for a drive. Prepare a picnic lunch and visit a local park. Take time to play catch or ride a bike. A stroll in the woods will help parents interact with their children. Also, a visit to the zoo or museum will spark a child’s enthusiasm and lead to lengthy discussions.
8. Encourage athletic activities. It is vital for children to exercise. Sports not only strengthen the body, but also build character and determination. Whether it’s a father pitching a baseball to a son or a mother and daughter nature walking, finding time for athletic events is important for a child’s emotional and physical development. This is a great opportunity for a family to interact.
9. Create a Family Time calendar. Since many parents have hectic schedules, time with children often becomes a low priority, whether intended or not. Post a calendar on the refrigerator and have parents and children pencil in special events. Knowing when you’re going to meet may also help you think of creative activities. Commit to keeping this schedule free from interruptions.
10. Pray together & attend a house of worship. Nothing is more special than taking a few minutes each day to pray with a child before bedtime. By explaining the purpose behind prayer, children will learn the importance of faith as the foundation for the family. Also, when parents go to religious services, they instill in their children a reverence for God. Churches can also offer invaluable support to families.

TIME MANAGEMENT

Hey, gotta minute?

We all possess valuable resources, but none is trickier or more valuable than time. Managing your time is THE key skill set in managing your life. Show what you do with your time and you show what your value system is all about. When leveraging time you will utilize and expand on core strength. If you can manage your time well you can accomplish almost anything. Using time incrementally, methodically, and strategically will help you stay on track and achieve your life priorities.

Personal productivity is only as limited as your proper use of time. Wise use of time maximizes and leverages all resources and helps you achieve your goals, objectives, and priorities. Good time management allows you to plan ahead and to use your purpose and passion with laser focus—nothing becomes impossible. Your productivity, as you leverage your passion through good time management, increases exponentially resulting in compelling accomplishment.

“Plan your work, then work your plan” is a great axiom. The “work your plan” part has to do with time management. Planning is great, but is useless without execution. Time management is all about the execution of your plans, goals, passions, and objectives.

Benjamin Franklin wrote, “Do you value life? Then waste no time, for that is the stuff of which life is made.” The value of anything that you obtain or accomplish can be determined by how much of your time, or your life, that you spent to acquire it.

The amount of yourself that you use up in achieving the goals that are important to you is a critical factor to consider, even before you begin. Only by discovering your innate strengths and developing and exploiting them to their highest degree can you utilize yourself to get the greatest amount of satisfaction and enjoyment from everything you do.

Deciding what you want to do, what you can do well, and what can give you the highest rewards for your efforts is the starting point in getting the best out of yourself.

Show me how much you love your family by how much time you give them. Show me a dad who loves his family and I’ll show you a guy who plans and spends time with them.
Personal Time Management

The definition of Time management: is a set of skills, tools, and systems that work together to help you get more value out of your time and leverage it to accomplish what you want.

Are You Half Paid?

“If you’re in this for the money, you are only about half paid…”

Bob Hammond (1921-2004)
Motivational Speaker/Dad

My father, Bob Hammond, grew up in Iowa during the Great Depression. He was poor but received two years of college before being enlisted in the Army Air Corps during World War II.

He was an elite P-51 fighter pilot in the Asian Theater and was a decorated soldier.

He drank for 30+ years as he processed the experience. Consequently, our family grew up within the confines of alcoholism, divorce, and dysfunction. As I got older, and my father got sober, we forged a relationship for a lifetime. His support for me going to Humboldt State University, coupled with a mutual spiritual revival, made for a lifelong friendship until his death in 2004. My father always supported my educational goals and expressed confidence in me; he always believed in my choices and was available 24/7.

He was a people person and an expert salesman. He was relational in every way. People were his passion.

The lessons my father taught me had to do with relationships. People were priority.

For example, he came to work with me one day at the Tri City Weekly in Downtown Eureka to attend and contribute to a sales meeting. I was so proud and excited for my cohorts to hear the wisdom of this sage businessman and sales expert! He was my dad—coming to share his heart.

We gathered around, pen and paper in hand to hear from Bob Hammond, Salesman Extraordinaire. We were ready…

He sat down at our office at 6th and D St. and we expected at least 30-45 minute training about the secrets of great sales. No Dice. Not even close…

He leaned back in his chair, took a deep breath, and uttered words that were simple and profound and have taken me 15 years to really comprehend….He simply stated:

“IF YOU ARE IN SALES FOR THE MONEY, YOU ARE ONLY HALF PAID.”

That was it. No prelude, no commentary, no addenda—Just 13 words spoken with authenticity and belief.

I must admit, I was a bit annoyed and aghast he didn’t have a strong follow-up and more to add. He didn’t need to.

His point was just this: In business, as in life, people and relationships are key. They are the reason for why we do what we do in business and commerce and in life. The Free Market System is lacking, even meaningless, without good relationships, friendships, and the joy of living a life full of meaningful experiences with fellow human beings.

My dad was a people guy, a hugger who loved crossword puzzles, plants, music, people, and God most of all. His legacy of kindness, acceptance, thankfulness, gratitude, and forgiveness will always be with me. As an alcoholic, he always had a special place in his heart for those who struggled with alcoholism. He modeled non-judgment and kindness toward all. My father left an inherent sense of godliness, spiritual value, and a kindness that transcends most people you’ll ever meet. Although he was a warrior in World War II and killed many while flying a P51 Mustang, the rest of his life was spent building, not destroying.
He’ll always be remembered in our family as the “ice cream grandpa”, who always loved Humboldt County and insisted on multiple gallons of ice cream with each and every visit. Here’s to the legacy of a great guy, a great sales person… one of the Greatest Generation. May we approach our lives, careers, and business with a relational dimension and the kindness and care that all people want and need. Thanks, Dad, for modeling this respect and honor for people in your quiet, but profound lesson.

KNOW, LIKE, TRUST, AND BUY YOU………?

SALES IN THE NEW ECOMONY

THE SALES MEETING: My dad Bob Hammond came to the Tri City Weekly Monday Sales meeting several years ago. I was really excited to see this expert address the craft of sales with my cohorts.  He sat there and said these few words: “If you are in sales for the money, you are only half paid.” I was waiting for the next 59 minutes….Nothing! He was finished. He sat back and was finished with the Sales Training…I got annoyed until I realized what he had really said…

THE INTERPRETATION: What my dad taught was that business and sales are about relationships and people. The key to sales is to simply “Grow Relationships”. IF they know you, like you, trust you, they WILL buy from you. Relationship is king and People are paramount.

The NEW ECONOMY:

New Economy 2011 is not “Business as Usual.” I have been on the streets of Humboldt County for 30 years selling and it has NEVER been like this. Example: my informal survey of 200+ businesses has yielded only about 10 or so businesses that are doing “well.”  I think 50% of those are exaggerating!  Things are tough!

SALES IN A NEW ECONOMY

It has been said: “Nothing happens till there is a Sale”—it is the 2^nd oldest profession! Capitalism and the Free Enterprise System are all based on sales and selling. Nothing happens till there is a sale. Sales IS foundation of our economy and the core of the free market system.

Old Practices and “business as usual” are NOT working. The “good old boy network” is not so good today!  We must work harder AND smarter if we want to survive.

Things are really spooky and scary…What will we do going forward?  How will YOU change and adapt to this “New Economy…?” Read on….

KNOW, LIKE, TRUST, and BUY YOU….HOW?

KNOW YOU— (know ability)

Who is the REAL YOU-Genuine, transparent, and human? In order for relationships to work people need to get to know you: Really know You- Not the adapted or “professional” you. Can you let down your guard and “keep it real?” Also, are you present in your customers world—Networking, BNI, Chamber, Rotary, Associations, Social Media, etc.

LIKE YOU— (likability)

How can you be a more LIKABLE you? Serve others! Serving, helping, loving others: Remember—“They don’t care how much you know- till they know how much you care.” Serving others helps them Like YOU! Helping others sets the stage for real likability.

TRUST YOU– (trustworthy)

My Dad Bob said “It takes money to buy whiskey.” What he meant is that actions promote credibility in all you do-Actions speak louder than words. True.

Trust simply takes time, consistency, availability, and starts with small steps of incremental credibility.

BUY YOU— (buy ability)

When it comes time to buy (if you have done the above), you are the trusted advisor. The natural outcome will be to use your services. You will be the #1. Choice when your customer goes shopping! You have won them with loyalty and good service–they may shop but will buy from YOU!

BUSINESS LEGACY—

What will you work on to improve your sales, character, integrity, and love for others? This is the stuff of real sales, life, and relationships.

What are you known for? What will they say at your funeral? How will you be remembered in life, family, and business? Were you known?  Liked? Trusted? And Bought?

It really is about people and relationships and that is what we leave behind in a positive legacy.  Please remember the immortal words: “If you’re in it for the money you are only half paid.” Why settle for any less?

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