1. Make Your Initial Point—Quickly and clearly. tell them what you are going to tell them.
2. Ask your Audience to Suspend Judgement–Ask them to hold back till they have heard you out.
3. Deliver Your Message/Request–Describe desired behavior or outcomes.
4. Confirm Understanding—Ask them to repeat what they think you said.
5. Get a Commitment–Ask for a promised response to your request—make it specific.
6. Followup—Ask and check in later….
“Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone the song is over -thought I’d something more to say…”
Pink Floyd–Time |
What will they say at your funeral? What would you want them to say? THAT will be your legacy and it will be too late to start working on your life of significance at your memorial. You can begin TODAY to work toward a “life legacy” and really make a positive difference!
How do you leave a legacy of positive leadership? Who doesn’t want to leave a positive legacy? Leadership and legacy means being PROACTIVE — being the first to:
- Take the initiative to communicate.
- Set the standard-leading by example.
- Managing, planning, resourcing, and serving those around you.
- Identify vision, goals and priorities.
- Take responsibility and saying (and living) “The buck stops here”.
- Leaders press on and press in; they run counter to the culture of convenience or opinion.
Think about your personal leadership… See life as a chance to identify your purpose, position, passion, and posture and then begin to live as though your life makes a real difference—because it does! Show your quality…
1. To Impress or to Influence?
Would you rather impress someone or truly have an influence in their life? Impressions are on the surface; therefore, they are often superficial. Influence, on the other hand, is often real, honest, and requires far more time, patience, resources, and relationship. Influence necessitates communication with people and the cessation of self-absorption. Start with being more about others and less about you and you WILL influence others.
2. Your Life’s Lessons.
Many of our life’s lessons are made up from our experiences, relationships, and mistakes. Have you been honest with your fears, failures, frustrations, and feelings? Can you safely share these with others who can benefit from your mistakes? This is the stuff of legacy!
Your hardships serve to shape your life’s message. That life message consists of a spiritual component, your life’s lessons, passions, and mission. Most of what we call failure can be transformed to tangible lessons we can share with those we love. Thus, pain is transformed to purpose and passion when we share transparently about life’s lessons.
3. Your Disposition.
Is your disposition credible, vulnerable, real, and genuine? Do you act and speak with genuineness and transparency in the way you treat others? Are you believable, touchable, straight up, humane, and do you have integrity? Are you “legit” as my kids say? Are you the real deal or a phony? Can we see the “real you”…? Who are YOU anyway?
4. Leadership’s Purpose.
People are the priority. Are you able to connect with people and are you a relationship builder? Do you serve and meet needs? Do you truly love other people unconditionally? Can you allow love to define your purpose and thereby your leadership legacy? Can you love and forgive yourself first? Are you a good communicator both in reaching out and listening?
5. Posture of a Legacy Leader.
Do you live in a mental posture of being open, teachable, and always learning? Are you able to lose preconceived notions ideas and attitudes? Do you walk and live in the art of possibility in your day-to-day living? Can you be a life-long learner or do you get stuck in old paradigms and ruts of thinking about life? Have you hung up your “cleats” or “thrown in the towel” as far as learning/living new stuff in life?
6. Passion and Legacy.
Passions define leadership. What are you passionate about? Are you a spokesperson for your passions? What causes, groups of people, or issues do you champion? What would you do for free if it were possible? That is your passion. Who/what do you weep for? This would be a great place to start living with intentionality and building your legacy.
7. Your Mission in life=People.
Do you want to leave a legacy of love for those around you? Then invest yourself in quality relationships with people. Be an example to follow. Serve others. Be communicative and relational with those in your life, world, and network. Press in and take the initiative.
8. Leadership and Adversity.
Leaving a legacy of leadership and living a life of real significance means facing and overcoming adversity. How you deal with adversity defines you. Are you bitter or better? You will need faith to face your challenges. You can come through hardship as someone who can truly serve others and help them in their time of need.
Find your voice and use it toward your life’s passions, purpose, posture, and position to leave a legacy of leadership. Find your voice and your gifts, and use them!! Help others find their voice and their gifts, so they too may leave a lasting legacy of leadership and a heritage of love. You will begin to live a life of meaning and significance and you will leave an awesome legacy!
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| Scott Hammond is a Parenting Expert and as a father of 9 children offers a unique point of view on fathering and intentional living. Scott is an Award Winning professional speaker and has been recognized as a business consultant/coach with 30 years of marketing experience. Scott is the author or “Every Day Dad-the Guide to Becoming a Better Father” available on Amazon.com. Reach out to Scott Hammond today at sjhammond@suddenlink.net. |
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Mindful Leadership
By Scott Hammond
Be a Leader- 5 Secrets to a Legacy
Leadership means many things to many people…I think it means being proactive… being the first:
- Taking the initiative
- Setting the standard
- Managing
- Planning
- Resourcing
- Identifying vision, goals and priorities
- A good leader takes responsibility and says” the buck stops here”.
- Leaders show the way and model by example what they’re trying to accomplish.
- Leaders press on and press in, and they run counter to the culture of convenience… they refuse to get stuck in the “bright and shiny objects”, diversions, and side eddies of our culture.
- Leaders strain and strive with intentionality and energy to build relationships and create a legacy and heritage and their families…. I do much of this is simply by taking the initiative, being intentional and planning by writing and accomplishing compelling goals that are relationship based…
Leaving a Legacy of Leadership
Who does not want to leave a positive legacy!
We want to leave a heritage to my family, friends, church and community at large.
Think about your personal leadership, through which you leave us a legacy to those behind you. See life as a chance to identify your purpose, position, passion, and posture.
What shapes you? Intentions? Motives? Opinions? Thoughts? Responses? What shapes your words, attitudes, deeds, reactions, and more?
So what is leadership, do you have it?
How do you get it?
To impress or to influence…
would you rather impress someone or truly have an influence in their life? Impressions are on the surface, therefore, are often superficial.
Influence on the other hand, is often real, honest, and requires far more ability.
Influence necessitates communication with people and the cessation of self absorption.
Your life’s lessons…
Many of our life’s lessons are made up from our experiences, relationships, and mistakes. Have you been honest with your fears, failures, frustrations, and feelings?
The above serve to shape your life’s message. That life’s message consists of a spiritual component, your life’s lessons, your life’s passions, and indeed, your life’s mission. Most of what we call failure can be transformed to tangible lessons we can share with those we have relationships with; pain transformed to purpose and passion.
Every leader has 5 components that define him or her.
1. Let’s talk about your POSITION…
Are you in a position to be credible, vulnerable, real, and genuine?
Are you believable, touchable, straight up, humane, and do you have integrity?
2. Every leader must have his PURPOSE.
People are the priority.
Are you able to connect with people are you a relationship builder?
Do you serve and meet needs?
Do you truly love other people?
Can you allow love to define your purpose and thereby your leadership legacy?
3. The third element of leadership is your POSTURE.
Do you live in a posture of being open, teachable, and always learning? Are you able to lose preconceived notions ideas and attitudes? You walk in the Spirit and live in the art of possibility in your day-to-day living?
4. One last element is your PASSION.
Passions define leadership.
What are you passionate about? Are you a spokesperson for your passions? What causes, groups of people, or issues do you champion?
5. Your Mission in life.
Do you want to leave a legacy of love for those around you?
Then have quality relationships with people. Be an example to follow. Serve others.
Leaving a legacy of leadership also means the facing and overcoming of adversity. How you deal with adversity defines you. Are you bitter, or better?
You will need faith to face your challenges. Then you can come through, as someone who can truly serve others and help them in their time of need.
A LEADER–
• A leader knows where she is going, why she is going, and how to get there
• A leader knows no discouragement, presents no alibi
• A leader knows how to lead without being dictatorial; true leaders are humble
• A leader leads for the good of the most concerned, and not for personal gratification of his or her own ideas
• A leader looks for the best in those he or she serves
• A leader marches with a group, and interprets correctly the signs of the pathway that leads to success
• A leader has his or her head in the clouds, but his or her feet on the ground
• A true leader considers leadership as an opportunity for service
• A leader is one who has not sought the high places, but who’s been drafted into service because of his or her ability and willingness to serve
• A leader listens, communicates, and cares
• A leader has courageous conversations
• A leader manages time, money, resources and is a good steward
• A leader washes dishes, cleans the bathrooms, and does what’s needed
• A leader does not look for, nor require, kudos
In conclusion, we all need to–
Find our voice and use it toward our life’s passions, purpose, posture, and position to leave a legacy of leadership. Find your voice and your gifts, and use your voice and your gifts. Lastly, help others find their voice and their gifts, so they too may leave a lasting legacy of leadership and a heritage of love.
About Scott
Scott Hammond is a Parenting Expert and as a father of 9 children (all theirs) offers a unique point of view on fathering and intentional parenting. Scott is an Award Winning professional speaker and has been recognized as a business consultant/coach with 30 years of marketing experience. Scott is a published Author and creator of BecomeaBetterFather.com
Scott was born in Emmetsburg, Iowa and grew up in San Diego California, before moving to Humboldt County California. Having earned his BA in Recreation Administration/Liberal Arts at Humboldt State University, Scott has worked in radio, newspaper, and the Cable TV ad sales industry for over 25 years. Recognized as Award Winning Competent and ATM Silver Toastmaster, and a graduate of the Cascadia School of leadership, Scott has completed and graduated from Pro Track, the National Speakers Association Northern California’s professional speaking school.
Scott uses a comfortable, personal speaking style to motivate, inspire, and train people toward positive personal, parental, and professional change and growth. He uses real life stories to connect with his audience via genuine authenticity and transparency in sharing ways to overcome life and parenting obstacles. He resides in McKinleyville California with his wife of 27 years Joni and 7 of 9 kids.
Leadership, Legacy, and Living a Life of Significance
By Scott Hammond
LEAVING YOUR LEGACY –PART 2.
“Each one of us here today will at one time in our lives look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question: We are willing to help, Lord, but what, if anything, is needed? For it is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don’t know what part of ourselves to give or, more often than not, the part we have to give is not wanted. And so it is those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them – we can love completely without complete understanding.”
- Norman Maclean (A River Runs Through It and Other Stories)
The definition from Dictionary.com: Legacy–”Anything handed down from the past”
Who does not want to leave a positive legacy and live a life of meaning and significance? Whether Baptist, Buddhist, or Baha’i– We all want to leave a heritage to our family, friends, church, and community at large. We all seek meaning in our lives. Think about your life and what you are leaving behind.
What shapes your life’s meaning and significance? What shapes your words, attitudes, and deeds that others will remember long after you are gone? What is a great legacy and how do you develop it? How do you get it? Perhaps the key question: “What will they say at your funeral?”
What would you want folks to say about you on your day? When it comes time for your Memorial Service, you cannot tell your story– so begin now to build your life of significance and meaning….TODAY!
1. HOW TO IDENTIFY THE SEEDS OF YOUR LEGACY
• Survey…Ask those who know you best what they think you are known for.
• Passion test…What is your love and passion in life? What “does it” for you?
• Mission Statement-Write your dreams/goals on paper -what gives your life meaning?
2. WHO IS YOUR ” LEGACY AUDIENCE”?
• Who listens to you?… Who best resonates with YOU? Who loves you and your life?
• Your life position…Are you in authority: a parent, boss, teacher, coach or mentor?
• Your demographic…Who are your “peeps”, community, tribe, or family?
• Who do you love?…Who do you pray for or love; for whom do you have the big burden?
• Your community…Specific people groups, clubs, organizations, church, etc…..
3. HOW TO ASSEMBLE YOUR “MEANING MESSAGE”-TOOLS OF A LEGACY
• Be a storyteller… Outline your life stories and begin to tell them!
• Venues/media…What format best fits your message & personality? Music, art, writing, story, speaking, etc….many more!
• Write your book…You really can self publish today on Amazon.com and more.
• Be creative…Spending time, sports, travel, listening, loving, and “being there” are all creative ways of leaving behind a life lived with significance. Think out of the box.
4. HOW TO KEEP IT REAL—”BEING LEGIT”
• Character…Are you really: genuine, encouraging, a servant and help to others, a giver, a teacher, a listener, a real friend to others in your life network?
• Relationship…Is it really about people for you? Are others the core of why you exist—or is it still all about you? Making it about others is way more fun and interesting and adds meaning. I mean it!
• Intentional Living…Live on and with purpose-to love and encourage those around you and leave this place a better one for those you have known and loved.
Do you want to leave a legacy of love for those around you?
Then have quality relationships with people. Be an example to follow. Serve others.
Leaving a legacy of leadership also means helping, encouraging, and hanging in there with others. It is then you can come through, as someone who can truly serve others and help them in their time of need.
In conclusion, we all need to… Find our voice and use it toward our life’s passions, purpose, posture, and position to leave a legacy of leadership. Find your voice and your gifts, and use your voice and your gifts. Lastly, help others find their voice and their gifts, so they too may leave a lasting legacy of leadership and a heritage of love. Live your life of meaning, significance, and legacy starting now!
About Scott
Scott Hammond is a Parenting Expert and as a father of 9 children (all theirs) offers a unique point of view on fathering and intentional parenting.
Scott is an Award Winning professional speaker and has been recognized as a business consultant/coach with 30 years of marketing experience.
Scott is a published Author and creator of http://www.BecomeaBetterFather.com
Scott was born in Emmetsburg, Iowa and grew up in San Diego California, before moving to Humboldt County California
True Story: Bob’s 7 Steps to a Legacy
You could put all of my father’s worldly possessions in his Chevy Celebrity, yet Bob Hammond left us incredible riches. He taught and modeled a love for life, God, and people that will transmit for generations. He was not a flashy man, yet his life was compelling, and his heritage rich with meaning.
Here are some tools that my father Bob used to leave his legacy and heritage–
- Time… Togetherness, investment in quality relationships with intentional time spent together.
- Communication…Talking, telling stories, laughing, and sharing life together, while communicating.
- Love for and Appreciation of Beauty… Noticing life intentionally- the flowers, people, gardens, plants, trees, birds, animals, and the natural world.
- Love for People… Appreciation and thankfulness for those in our lives. Expressions of love through hugs, focused attention, eye contact, encouragement, and appropriate touch.
- Love for God… Actively having a love affair with our Creator, based in a worshipful heart disposition. Living in intentional expression in: church community, Fellowship, the study of truth, prayer, using our gifts, and living a life of love for God and people.
- Having fun… Being present, in the moment, and spontaneous. Making time for what’s really important. Being able to stop and smell the flowers, taste the ice cream, and generally enjoy the simple things. “The best things in life are not things at all.”
- Being a Lifelong Learner… Possessing a hunger and thirst for truth, knowledge, wisdom, understanding, and a compelling education. Truly being a student of life, with the intent of discovering your strengths and gifts and making application to make your world a better place.
Stuff that’s Caught not Taught–
10 Ways To Make Time For Your Children
- Commit to a family mealtime each day.
- Write your children’s activities into your schedule book – in ink!
- Identify one thing on your weekly schedule you can do without and replace it with kid time.
- Take one of your children along when you run errands.
- Volunteer to participate in a regularly scheduled child activity, such as coaching a softball team or helping with a school activity.
- Identify one children’s show on TV that you secretly like to watch and make a point of watching it with your child.
- Develop an interest in a hobby you and your child can enjoy together.
- If your work requires that you travel, take one of your children along with you when your business trip can be extended into a long weekend.
- If your work schedule is flexible, start your work day earlier so you can get home earlier in the afternoon to be with your family.
Leave your work, cellular phones and pagers at home when you go on family vacations and outings.
