10 KEYS TO RAISING EXTRA UNIQUE KIDS

Extra Mile Parenting; 10 Keys To Raising Extra-Unique Kids

Extra-mile parents are those who accept their child’s condition, are aware of their family’s emotional needs, and seek to build a positive attitude in their family culture. They have learned to grieve openly, celebrate freely, respect the feelings of each family member, and to get the focus off themselves. These parents are heroes we have much to learn from. Here are ten keys to help you become that extra-mile parent.

1. Patience. Everything comes more slowly to EU kids. Milestones are fewer and far apart, but this makes achievements all the sweeter.
2. Acknowledge grief. Revisiting grief is normal and natural, especially at birthdays, special occasions, or other milestone events in your child’s life. Allow yourself room to grieve and talk, and then move on.
3. It’s not about you. Remember it’s really about accepting your child and being OK with who they are. Don’t make it about yourself; remember your goal is to resource, facilitate, and love your child first.
4. Support. Find and link up with like-minded parents who are willing to be real, genuine, and transparent about their lives, struggles, and victories.
5. Slow down. Be here now and focus on enjoying your EU child. Get into their world by being present and in the moment, and stepping off of your own life roller coaster, even if only for a few moments.
6. Let your child teach you. Learn from their simplicity, spontaneity, and the joy with which they approach life. Learn from their perspective how to enjoy simple things again.
7. Making comparisons. Avoid the dangerous pitfall of comparing your child to any others. She is unique, perfect, and valuable, so enjoy her as God made her.
8. Unrealistic expectations. When your expectations are beyond what is realistic, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Be aware and honest with your unspoken and even subconscious, unrealistic expectations of your family life.
9. Vicarious identity. Remember, it’s not about you. When you feel embarrassment, shame, or perceived disapproval of your child, it’s not about you or your reputation, or your value as a person. Consider this…is it possible the problem lays in others, or even yourself? Ultimately, this is about being OK with who you are as a family and accepting and even celebrating it.
10. Be Yourself. Focus on being real, transparent, and authentic as you walk through life and your EU experience. Keep a good sense of humor and be willing to really laugh and have a perspective which allows you to have fun, enjoy life, and be yourself in the context of your family challenges.